brother

We were at a relaxed venue, listening to music. I sat on the low stage, facing away from the audience, in the middle of a circle of young men who had joined together to perform a song. Each of the men had a quality that reminded me of the classical troubadour. When they had finished, I sat in a particular way with my legs to one side and my back stretched so that it was very long. I realised that I was not me but a version of my brother. I was wearing a loose grey jumper that hung about my frame in a becoming way and I enjoyed the sensation of my changed body. I turned and saw two things: a young woman in the audience admiring me (as my brother) and my actual brother. He came over to speak to me and I could sense that he was deeply emotional. He leaned his forehead against mine and we talked with one another in that position for some time. Though we were in such close proximity, I could clearly see the details of his face. I could see his dark brown eyes shining, the fleck of light on each of the minute hairs covering his skin causing him to sparkle, the curl of his hair and the intricate shape of his face. I could not only see him with great clarity, but feel him, the strength and fragility of him. He told me that he was on a sea, riding waves of deep sadness and joy. I suggested that he stay with me and my sister, that we look after each other.